A Girl’s Best Friend….

Yep yep you've guessed it high heels are indeed a girls best friend.

I’m tiny coming in at just under 5 ft so heels should be really be my best friend but it fact the are my worst enemy. Well actually I tell a lie we have a love hate relationship.

Let’s talk about the love …..

I am a shoe queen there is no doubt about it …I can’t walk down Grafton street without stopping in Fitzpatrick’s , BT or Aldo for just a “quick peek”  which usually involves spending about an hour going ohhh  ahhh  and planning how I am going to spend my next pay packet. My collection as I like to call it holds every type of shoe imaginable. I often spend my lunch time in work looking at fashion websites looking for shoes.

Now for the other side of my obsession …

As you may be aware I have arthritis in pretty much every joint so this poses three problems

1. Heels make my joints ache not just the little joints in my feet but my hips & my back ... Heck let's be honest here it can even take a toll on my neck.
2. My feet range from a size 3 ½ on a good day to 5 ½ on a bad day. Lately I can’t fit my feet into my pretty little shoes. It’s  beginning to bug me because I must keep several types, styles and sizes with me as I never know what size my feet will be.
3. Pumps, ballet , flat shoes etc…  while they are flat shoes they also pose a problem as my feet are too swollen so I can’t fit into them.

When I’m out and about I usually resort to a good old comfy pair of runners…. Yep runners while they are comfy and spacious let’s face it they are far from attractive and quite simply they look awful with skinny jeans and dresses(Let’s not even go down that road).

I’ve now reached the stage whereby I plan my outfit around my shoes depending on how my feet feel which in itself is annoying because I can’t wear what I want  and then when the swelling subsides the shoes are too big for me.

Now back to the love hate relationship ….

I had a little bit of luck recently I found a gorgeous pair of wedge heels actually I fell in love with them having spotted them on the fashionable Lisa who told me they were ever so comfy so off I went to purchase them and I haven’t looked back since. In fact I was away last weekend and received several compliments on my latest purchase. It’s amazing the confidence a pair of heels can.

I love to buy shoes but it hasn’t registered with my brain that I can no longer wear fashionable shoes in fact I think my boyfriends sister has worn most of heels more times than I have.  

I wish someone would design a fashionable range of shoes I’m sure most people whether they have arthritis or not would fork out a few extra quid for a comfy yet stylish shoes. So calling all shoe designers please please please design FASHIONABLE shoes that won’t cripple my feet.

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Let's Dance with Arthritis

Saturday saw the kick off of the ‘Let’s Dance’ workshops. Well I have to say I wasn’t disappointed. Upon arrival we had a chance to mingle over tea and coffee which was a great ice breaker. Our instructor Brian Redmond is a 3 times “All Ireland” ballroom champion, “All Ireland” show dance champion and he was also an “All Ireland” youth Latin American champion. He definitely understands the needs of dancers but I was worried he might not understand the needs of a person living with arthritis…. How wrong was I? From the second I arrived in the ballroom I was put totally at ease.

The class itself was designed specifically for people with arthritis and Brian himself was trained in arthritis management by a physiotherapist. He also told us that his dad has arthritis. I think both of these aspects really played a part in his understanding of movement and arthritis and definitely came to bear on how this class was designed. Some of the steps were even redesigned so that they are comfortable for a person with arthritis to do.

Brian taught us two styles of dance – Salsa and the Waltz. The salsa which is my personal favourite was fabulous! I left the class with the steps playing over and over in my head. I was surprised how quick and easy it was to pick up too. Brian breaks the dance down into the basic steps making it easy for anyone to learn. Once the music started playing, the class really got moving around the dance floor. The class was without doubt the right style and pace for people with arthritis.

Finally the class finished with the waltz. I was worried about this one given the traditional ‘hold’ puts a lot of pressure on the upper body. I need not have been worried however as the first step we were taught was an adjusted hold which is a lot lower, thereby reducing the pressure any one of the joints.

Before I knew it the class was over. So what was the highlight? The fact that I learnt to dance while exercising and I didn’t realize it – Now that’s what I call a genius idea!! In the cold winter months I think this will definitely be my preferred method of keeping these joints moving!

The ‘Let’s Dance’ workshops continue throughout the country. For more information, clickhere 

Laughter the best medicine ???

Yesterday started off as just your average day I’m still feeling a little under the weather so I was having a lazy morning . Made myself a cuppa and I went back to bed to catch up on  the latest episodes  of Grey’s Anatomy and Desperate Housewives. Not long after I was tucked up in bed I received a text from a friend to see if I wanted to go for a bite to eat.

We met at one for lunch at Michie Sushi which was the perfect way to start the afternoon the food was fab afterwards we strolled over to a local cafe for some hot chocolate and a chance to have a a bit of a catch up. Pondering what to do for the rest of the day we decided to go to Dundrum shopping center for some ice skating. A quick visit to pennys for some extra socks to keep my feet warm we were ready to skate.

 As a child I loved to Rollerblade I had no fear I would zoom down the hill without a second thought so naturally I love to ice skate.For that one hour I thought I was a child again & I managed not to fall or more to point avoid the children who whizzed around with no fear until the fell but within seconds jumped back up.

After the hour I was tired and cold but for that one hour I put that thought to the back to my mind and concentrated on having fun. Afterwards we went to Hamleys toy store and stopped at the new Xbox Kinect which I enjoyed a bit too much and we finished the day off with Dublin’s best chips Burdocks Yum.....

This morning I’m paying the price for my eventful day but you know what ...? It was sooooo worth it ... I had a ball in fact I had the most fun I’ve had in ages....it was a day filled with laughter & fun. Laughter really can be the best medicine!

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The pain freeze

The silence of the night makes the past hour feel longer I'm alone in my apartment in the middle of a flare up I feel awful and alone. Its late to late to call anyone I’m trying to distract myself from the intense pain I feel in both legs.

My journey home from work is a short fifteen minute walk but today it took 35 min. It started off with a struggle on my crutches trying to  reach the nearest bus stop approx 750m away, today it took me twenty five minutes to get there by the time I reached the bus stop I was exhausted. When I reached home I thought I was going to pass out with the pain so I collapsed on the couch unable to move.  Luckily my boyfriend was on hand and made dinner before he carried me into bed where I have been   since 7pm unable to move.

Today was my first day back at work after three days sick leave to say I was embarrassed is an understatement my colleagues never saw me use a crutch before as my legs are very rarely a problem . Work were great everyone offered to help me even though for most of the day I was stubborn I didn't wanna ask for help.By 3.30 I was exhausted and didn't have any energy it was the little things I found hard going to the printer and making myself a cuppa thankfully they all knew I have an addiction to tea and I was supplied with several cups.

I woke an hour ago by pain rushing though my body depriving my body of much needed sleep my knees and ankles are warm, sore &  inflamed easily twice the size they were a few hours ago.  My legs feel like cement, I can’t move them, it’s impossible.Usually I curl into the comforting fetal position to sleep I cant tonight in fact I cant do much I feel useless.

So now I’m wide awake I can’t move just a few hours ago I was able to move a few steps without my crutches so foolishly I left them in the sitting room. I’m thirsty and in need of a glass of water so I try to move using all my energy I try to get out of bed but the pain is horrific and so I lie in silence waiting for the morning to come minutes seem like hours. My body is shattered but pain will not allow me drift asleep its impossible to get comfortable each time I move it hurt’s.

Its times like this I find the having arthritis a nightmare which myself and many other young people must endure . I feel angry that I can’t do a thing I try to stay positive but the longer I'm awake the more positivity dwindles into despair and I enter into battle with my body while it battles with me . It wears me down and down as my body get increasingly tired I begin to drift into a restless sleep but minutes later I am woken by pain once again .

I know I will make it though the night but right now it doesn't feel like it will. Knowing I have work in the morning I desperately want to get some sleep as I know tiredness will only add to my problems . I took my weekly dose of methrexate yesterday all ready my mouth is covered in mouth ulcers my tongue is swollen I must easily have ten.

I’ve never felt so alone while many of friends went out tonight I had to stay at home because I can’t move let alone walk. My friends are gone to a gig, something I used to enjoy.  I too had planned to go but having arthritis means sometimes things don’t work out.  I need to think and plan and re plan. Tonight was no question of that being impossible.  On a regular night out when I walk into a bar the first thing I look for is not a drink but a seat . Anyone who knows me will tell you that I love music and most of all to dance but for the past while I haven’t had the energy to dance. I feel like I’ve lost something within me,  a little sparkle that comes out when I dance.  Today I am 24 trapped in a  94 year old body.

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My lotto win

 The Lotto reached  16 million the second highest jackpot in Irish history so I like many others went to my local shop and played a few lines laughing with I would do with my winnings if I was lucky enough to win.

On the way back it was beginning to get dark so like every night since I was a ten I make the same wish on the first star I see twinkle twinkle little star I wish someone could find the big C a cure for arthritis.

I nickname my mornings a battle a battle which I win most days. You may ask how do I win ? Well it’s simple I get up out of bed I may struggle but I get there I make my way to work just like everyone else and I win. Sometimes its easier for me to let the pain take over but I won’t because if I do arthritis win’s and takes over. Childish as it seems it’s my motivation and a silly little game I play ever morning but for me it works. Its putting one foot in front of the other and I get there granted some days it takes longer than others but I make it.

So it’s Sunday morning and for the first time in 15 years I woke up with relatively no pain a strange  feeling  so I dance around the house like some crazed  lunatic  but I don’t care I can move and it's not even 9 am ….

I feel like it’s a dream it may only be one morning but for me this is better than winning the lotto if you don’t have  arthritis then this might be the difficult to understand but words cant describe how I feel. I’m on top of the world I truly believe right now I am the happiest girl in the world. 

This feeling may only be short live but for me this is motivation to stay strong and positive because I believe someone will find a cure for arthritis and It will happen in my time.